It reads well, it's well-structured and responds to your question. You maintain a focus on graphic design throughout.
Further consideration could go into how you could embed triangulation within your essay, backing up points with a further example or theory.
In the whole it's nearly there!
Feedback from Pete:
- The intro needs to be more formalised as currently it doesn't read as an intro
- Never use the word 'moreover' in an essay
- Essay is in need of some serious proof reading. I need to make clear statements and re-word my sentences
As a whole, I feel really confused about how to go forward with my essay. I'm going to go ahead and make the changes that Pete suggested, but can only do this for a limited amount of time as I need my essay to be finished for the production of my practical. At this stage in the module, I don't know whether to prioritise re-writing my essay or cracking on with my physical. My plan is to spend a little more time finishing my essay off before calling it a day and putting all of my effort into producing my publication. I don't feel that the feedback I have been given so far is very constructive or specific to my themes that I am writing about so I'm also going to get my friends to read my essay and provide some feedback.
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